Ref T5750. Give up and use offset paging.
Each page will become progressively slower, but the amount of time I was sinking into T7803 without making real headway was not justified by fixing this. In comparison, this took 10 minutes. It isn't really useful to browse through tens of thousands of results anyway, and no one is realistically going to try to do that (later in this sequence, I'll explicitly prevent it).
