diff --git a/resources/celerity/map.php b/resources/celerity/map.php
--- a/resources/celerity/map.php
+++ b/resources/celerity/map.php
@@ -8,7 +8,7 @@
 return array(
   'names' => array(
     'core.pkg.css' => '70320e8a',
-    'core.pkg.js' => '5a1c336d',
+    'core.pkg.js' => '28ef0e70',
     'darkconsole.pkg.js' => '8ab24e01',
     'differential.pkg.css' => '1940be3f',
     'differential.pkg.js' => '53c1ccc2',
@@ -207,7 +207,8 @@
     'rsrc/externals/javelin/lib/Resource.js' => '44959b73',
     'rsrc/externals/javelin/lib/Routable.js' => 'b3e7d692',
     'rsrc/externals/javelin/lib/Router.js' => '29274e2b',
-    'rsrc/externals/javelin/lib/Scrollbar.js' => '1feea462',
+    'rsrc/externals/javelin/lib/Scrollbar.js' => '1ed54a27',
+    'rsrc/externals/javelin/lib/Sound.js' => '59655c83',
     'rsrc/externals/javelin/lib/URI.js' => '6eff08aa',
     'rsrc/externals/javelin/lib/Vector.js' => '2caa8fb8',
     'rsrc/externals/javelin/lib/WebSocket.js' => 'e292eaf4',
@@ -347,15 +348,14 @@
     'rsrc/image/texture/table_header_tall.png' => 'd56b434f',
     'rsrc/js/application/aphlict/Aphlict.js' => '2be71d56',
     'rsrc/js/application/aphlict/behavior-aphlict-dropdown.js' => '830b3278',
-    'rsrc/js/application/aphlict/behavior-aphlict-listen.js' => '851f167c',
+    'rsrc/js/application/aphlict/behavior-aphlict-listen.js' => 'bdf2226d',
     'rsrc/js/application/aphlict/behavior-aphlict-status.js' => 'ea681761',
     'rsrc/js/application/auth/behavior-persona-login.js' => '9414ff18',
     'rsrc/js/application/config/behavior-reorder-fields.js' => '14a827de',
-    'rsrc/js/application/conpherence/ConpherenceThreadManager.js' => '11e2dcf2',
-    'rsrc/js/application/conpherence/behavior-durable-column.js' => '5fc7fac0',
-    'rsrc/js/application/conpherence/behavior-menu.js' => '6bc52765',
-    'rsrc/js/application/conpherence/behavior-pontificate.js' => '21ba5861',
-    'rsrc/js/application/conpherence/behavior-widget-pane.js' => '2c1cd7f5',
+    'rsrc/js/application/conpherence/behavior-durable-column.js' => 'e4affa94',
+    'rsrc/js/application/conpherence/behavior-menu.js' => '869e3445',
+    'rsrc/js/application/conpherence/behavior-pontificate.js' => '86df5915',
+    'rsrc/js/application/conpherence/behavior-widget-pane.js' => '40b1ff90',
     'rsrc/js/application/countdown/timer.js' => 'e4cc26b3',
     'rsrc/js/application/dashboard/behavior-dashboard-async-panel.js' => '469c0d9e',
     'rsrc/js/application/dashboard/behavior-dashboard-move-panels.js' => '82439934',
@@ -517,7 +517,6 @@
     'conpherence-menu-css' => 'c6ac5299',
     'conpherence-message-pane-css' => '5930260a',
     'conpherence-notification-css' => '04a6e10a',
-    'conpherence-thread-manager' => '11e2dcf2',
     'conpherence-update-css' => '1099a660',
     'conpherence-widget-pane-css' => '3d575438',
     'differential-changeset-view-css' => '6a8b172a',
@@ -544,7 +543,7 @@
     'javelin-aphlict' => '2be71d56',
     'javelin-behavior' => '61cbc29a',
     'javelin-behavior-aphlict-dropdown' => '830b3278',
-    'javelin-behavior-aphlict-listen' => '851f167c',
+    'javelin-behavior-aphlict-listen' => 'bdf2226d',
     'javelin-behavior-aphlict-status' => 'ea681761',
     'javelin-behavior-aphront-basic-tokenizer' => 'b3a4b884',
     'javelin-behavior-aphront-crop' => 'fa0f4fc2',
@@ -557,9 +556,9 @@
     'javelin-behavior-boards-dropdown' => '0ec56e1d',
     'javelin-behavior-choose-control' => '6153c708',
     'javelin-behavior-config-reorder-fields' => '14a827de',
-    'javelin-behavior-conpherence-menu' => '6bc52765',
-    'javelin-behavior-conpherence-pontificate' => '21ba5861',
-    'javelin-behavior-conpherence-widget-pane' => '2c1cd7f5',
+    'javelin-behavior-conpherence-menu' => '869e3445',
+    'javelin-behavior-conpherence-pontificate' => '86df5915',
+    'javelin-behavior-conpherence-widget-pane' => '40b1ff90',
     'javelin-behavior-countdown-timer' => 'e4cc26b3',
     'javelin-behavior-dark-console' => '08883e8b',
     'javelin-behavior-dashboard-async-panel' => '469c0d9e',
@@ -584,7 +583,7 @@
     'javelin-behavior-diffusion-locate-file' => '6d3e1947',
     'javelin-behavior-diffusion-pull-lastmodified' => '2b228192',
     'javelin-behavior-doorkeeper-tag' => 'e5822781',
-    'javelin-behavior-durable-column' => '5fc7fac0',
+    'javelin-behavior-durable-column' => 'e4affa94',
     'javelin-behavior-error-log' => '6882e80a',
     'javelin-behavior-fancy-datepicker' => 'c51ae228',
     'javelin-behavior-global-drag-and-drop' => '07f199d8',
@@ -678,7 +677,8 @@
     'javelin-resource' => '44959b73',
     'javelin-routable' => 'b3e7d692',
     'javelin-router' => '29274e2b',
-    'javelin-scrollbar' => '1feea462',
+    'javelin-scrollbar' => '1ed54a27',
+    'javelin-sound' => '59655c83',
     'javelin-stratcom' => '6c53634d',
     'javelin-tokenizer' => '7644823e',
     'javelin-typeahead' => '70baed2f',
@@ -899,16 +899,6 @@
       'javelin-install',
       'javelin-util',
     ),
-    '11e2dcf2' => array(
-      'javelin-dom',
-      'javelin-util',
-      'javelin-stratcom',
-      'javelin-install',
-      'javelin-workflow',
-      'javelin-router',
-      'javelin-behavior-device',
-      'javelin-vector',
-    ),
     '13c739ea' => array(
       'javelin-behavior',
       'javelin-stratcom',
@@ -962,7 +952,7 @@
       'javelin-dom',
       'javelin-reactor-dom',
     ),
-    '1feea462' => array(
+    '1ed54a27' => array(
       'javelin-install',
       'javelin-dom',
       'javelin-stratcom',
@@ -980,14 +970,6 @@
       'phabricator-phtize',
       'changeset-view-manager',
     ),
-    '21ba5861' => array(
-      'javelin-behavior',
-      'javelin-dom',
-      'javelin-util',
-      'javelin-workflow',
-      'javelin-stratcom',
-      'conpherence-thread-manager',
-    ),
     '2290aeef' => array(
       'javelin-install',
       'javelin-dom',
@@ -1032,19 +1014,6 @@
       'javelin-stratcom',
       'javelin-dom',
     ),
-    '2c1cd7f5' => array(
-      'javelin-behavior',
-      'javelin-dom',
-      'javelin-stratcom',
-      'javelin-workflow',
-      'javelin-util',
-      'phabricator-notification',
-      'javelin-behavior-device',
-      'phuix-dropdown-menu',
-      'phuix-action-list-view',
-      'phuix-action-view',
-      'conpherence-thread-manager',
-    ),
     '2c426492' => array(
       'javelin-behavior',
       'javelin-dom',
@@ -1100,6 +1069,18 @@
       'javelin-dom',
       'javelin-reactor-dom',
     ),
+    '40b1ff90' => array(
+      'javelin-behavior',
+      'javelin-dom',
+      'javelin-stratcom',
+      'javelin-workflow',
+      'javelin-util',
+      'phabricator-notification',
+      'javelin-behavior-device',
+      'phuix-dropdown-menu',
+      'phuix-action-list-view',
+      'phuix-action-view',
+    ),
     42126667 => array(
       'javelin-behavior',
       'javelin-dom',
@@ -1196,6 +1177,9 @@
       'javelin-vector',
       'javelin-dom',
     ),
+    '59655c83' => array(
+      'javelin-install',
+    ),
     '59b251eb' => array(
       'javelin-behavior',
       'javelin-stratcom',
@@ -1219,15 +1203,6 @@
       'javelin-dom',
       'javelin-vector',
     ),
-    '5fc7fac0' => array(
-      'javelin-behavior',
-      'javelin-dom',
-      'javelin-stratcom',
-      'javelin-scrollbar',
-      'javelin-quicksand',
-      'phabricator-keyboard-shortcut',
-      'conpherence-thread-manager',
-    ),
     '5fefb143' => array(
       'javelin-behavior',
       'javelin-dom',
@@ -1268,18 +1243,6 @@
     '69adf288' => array(
       'javelin-install',
     ),
-    '6bc52765' => array(
-      'javelin-behavior',
-      'javelin-dom',
-      'javelin-util',
-      'javelin-stratcom',
-      'javelin-workflow',
-      'javelin-behavior-device',
-      'javelin-history',
-      'javelin-vector',
-      'phabricator-shaped-request',
-      'conpherence-thread-manager',
-    ),
     '6c2b09a2' => array(
       'javelin-install',
       'javelin-util',
@@ -1466,19 +1429,6 @@
       'javelin-uri',
       'javelin-routable',
     ),
-    '851f167c' => array(
-      'javelin-behavior',
-      'javelin-aphlict',
-      'javelin-stratcom',
-      'javelin-request',
-      'javelin-uri',
-      'javelin-dom',
-      'javelin-json',
-      'javelin-router',
-      'javelin-util',
-      'javelin-leader',
-      'phabricator-notification',
-    ),
     '85ea0626' => array(
       'javelin-install',
     ),
@@ -1489,6 +1439,24 @@
       'phabricator-tooltip',
       'changeset-view-manager',
     ),
+    '869e3445' => array(
+      'javelin-behavior',
+      'javelin-dom',
+      'javelin-util',
+      'javelin-stratcom',
+      'javelin-workflow',
+      'javelin-behavior-device',
+      'javelin-history',
+      'javelin-vector',
+      'phabricator-shaped-request',
+    ),
+    '86df5915' => array(
+      'javelin-behavior',
+      'javelin-dom',
+      'javelin-util',
+      'javelin-workflow',
+      'javelin-stratcom',
+    ),
     '87cb6b51' => array(
       'javelin-behavior',
       'javelin-dom',
@@ -1744,6 +1712,20 @@
       'javelin-util',
       'javelin-request',
     ),
+    'bdf2226d' => array(
+      'javelin-behavior',
+      'javelin-aphlict',
+      'javelin-stratcom',
+      'javelin-request',
+      'javelin-uri',
+      'javelin-dom',
+      'javelin-json',
+      'javelin-router',
+      'javelin-util',
+      'javelin-leader',
+      'javelin-sound',
+      'phabricator-notification',
+    ),
     'be807912' => array(
       'javelin-behavior',
       'javelin-dom',
@@ -1860,6 +1842,14 @@
       'javelin-dom',
       'javelin-uri',
     ),
+    'e4affa94' => array(
+      'javelin-behavior',
+      'javelin-dom',
+      'javelin-stratcom',
+      'javelin-scrollbar',
+      'javelin-quicksand',
+      'phabricator-keyboard-shortcut',
+    ),
     'e4cc26b3' => array(
       'javelin-behavior',
       'javelin-dom',
diff --git a/src/applications/celerity/controller/CelerityResourceController.php b/src/applications/celerity/controller/CelerityResourceController.php
--- a/src/applications/celerity/controller/CelerityResourceController.php
+++ b/src/applications/celerity/controller/CelerityResourceController.php
@@ -125,6 +125,7 @@
       'woff2' => 'font/woff2',
       'eot' => 'font/eot',
       'ttf' => 'font/ttf',
+      'mp3' => 'audio/mpeg',
     );
   }
 
diff --git a/src/applications/celerity/resources/CelerityResourcesOnDisk.php b/src/applications/celerity/resources/CelerityResourcesOnDisk.php
--- a/src/applications/celerity/resources/CelerityResourcesOnDisk.php
+++ b/src/applications/celerity/resources/CelerityResourcesOnDisk.php
@@ -37,6 +37,7 @@
       'woff2',
       'ttf',
       'eot',
+      'mp3',
     );
   }
 
diff --git a/webroot/rsrc/externals/javelin/lib/Sound.js b/webroot/rsrc/externals/javelin/lib/Sound.js
new file mode 100644
--- /dev/null
+++ b/webroot/rsrc/externals/javelin/lib/Sound.js
@@ -0,0 +1,38 @@
+/**
+ * @requires javelin-install
+ * @provides javelin-sound
+ * @javelin
+ */
+
+
+JX.install('Sound', {
+  statics: {
+    _sounds: {},
+
+    load: function(uri) {
+      var self = JX.Sound;
+
+      if (!(uri in self._sounds)) {
+        self._sounds[uri] = JX.$N(
+          'audio',
+          {
+            src: uri,
+            preload: 'auto'
+          });
+      }
+    },
+
+    play: function(uri) {
+      var self = JX.Sound;
+      self.load(uri);
+
+      var sound = self._sounds[uri];
+
+      try {
+        sound.play();
+      } catch (ex) {
+        JX.log(ex);
+      }
+    }
+  }
+});
diff --git a/webroot/rsrc/js/application/aphlict/behavior-aphlict-listen.js b/webroot/rsrc/js/application/aphlict/behavior-aphlict-listen.js
--- a/webroot/rsrc/js/application/aphlict/behavior-aphlict-listen.js
+++ b/webroot/rsrc/js/application/aphlict/behavior-aphlict-listen.js
@@ -10,6 +10,7 @@
  *           javelin-router
  *           javelin-util
  *           javelin-leader
+ *           javelin-sound
  *           phabricator-notification
  */
 
@@ -97,4 +98,17 @@
     .setHandler(onAphlictMessage)
     .start();
 
+  JX.Leader.listen('onReceiveBroadcast', function(message, is_leader) {
+    if (message.type !== 'sound') {
+      return;
+    }
+
+    if (!is_leader) {
+      return;
+    }
+
+    JX.Sound.play(message.data);
+  });
+
+
 });